JoMo Suffers from “Social Narcolepsy”

With Joe Moran’s recent behavior in public – from stealing Splenda to nabbing other people’s drinks – we would have pegged him as a total klepto, but apparently the No Moore star has another disorder under his belt.

At a recent social networking event at HK Restaurant in Hell’s Kitchen, Moran was chatting with a group of tax brokers, investment bankers, and human resource managers when he suddenly dropped to the floor. Bystanders, knowing only about numbers and 403(b) plans, were unable to revive Moran for two full minutes.

Just as restaurant officials were sending for the paramedics, Moran awoke in a daze. When questioned about the incident, Moran commented “Oh, man, not again. This has been happening a lot lately. My doctor says I’m suffering from social narcolepsy.”

But Moran’s co-star, Jason Koth, begs to differ. “Oh, please. He was pissed because they weren’t including him in the conversation and he needed some attention. I saw the whole thing.” Koth, who has been laying low since his stalking incident, was guest bartending the event in disguise.


Koth added, “If he was really narcoleptic, he would have dropped his damn drink. Idiot."

Moran's neurologist was unavailable for comment.